This week’s Coaching: Status Anxiety. I went to a business networking mixer with some friends and when we debriefed afterwards one new business owner felt insulted and offended that after initiating conversations and handing her business cards out to requestors…. she had been categorized, labeled a commodity, assigned an over simplistic persona, judged and dismissed; all in about 30 seconds time.
After about fifteen minutes of this treatment she clammed up and refused further conversations with any one else. She was experiencing Status Anxiety.
The world can be insensitive, cruel, unforgiving and overly judgmental. People may know something about you but they don’t know you. Your attitude should be…. yeah, so, what’s next?
Here’s how to say that and mean it
- Eliminate all inner conflict. Does what you desire match your actions? You cannot out-perform the image you hold of yourself. You can’t fake confidence in yourself ..at least not for very long. When things get tough and challenging fake doesn’t hold up.
- Acknowledge your distinct value and contribution, what you can do unlike anyone else. If you don’t know your value, no one else will. Recognize that feedback is a reflection of the giver, not you.
- People routinely take a small part of you and use that as an overlay to judge the whole of you; what you are, who you are. Someone half looking at his or her iPhone while meeting you cannot possibly absorb the complete richness of your character.
It takes courage not to be discouraged. Build the strength and resourcefulness to trust your own judgment over others. Do not look for, seek, expect or rely on external validation.
Embrace Karma Yoga, AKA selfless service. It is action you take because you want to, nothing else. It has nothing to do with anyone other than YOU.